Remember kids, Safety Third.

Failblog. What else is there to say haha.

Did pretty much nothing today but get kicked out of a pointless class that has nothing to do with what people will treat you like in the real fucking world. You want an apartment, well you make $80000 dollars a week, so just cash that fucking imaginary check and I suppose if you're careful, you can do it!

What bullshit.

(BTW: We are getting BUTT RAPED! with snow for the next few days so..... OVEN HERE I COME!!)

My letters to B just get sadder and sadder. I feel like I have nothing to say anymore. I'm glad he won't see them until after he gets back. If I can handle this that long. I really don't know if I can do this anymore. It hasn't even been that long but, the less new stories I have to tell about him, the more I feel like he's just someone I made up. I must be crazy to think like that, but I do.

Like he was just a really great dream....

I find myself having a much shorter fuse. (to point out the obvious) Even to my friends. No, more like ESPECIALLY to my friends. I feel terrible about it but I don't know what to do or say. It really is like a piece of me is gone. M and C get to see each other and (FUCK- I'm really jealous about the fuck part.) so I'm stuck here alone. I have nothing to occupy my time.

Yay! Monday- N doesn't have treatment, chill w/ her till Eleven or so cuz I can't stand to be alone with my thoughts

Tuesday- Sucktastic. Nothing usually planned, but nothing of any significance.

Wednesday- M has art club, sit around there for a while. Then listen to some good-halfway decent music at T station.

Thursday- Everyone's pumped for the weekend. Except Emo-me.

Friday- YAY!! M leaves for C's (except this weekend, so I'm holding out a little hope there...)

Saturday- Sit on my fat lazy ass until N gets done with treatment, then do something stupid or watch her get stoned, maybe hang out with Johnny.

Sunday- Pretty much the same, only tighter curfew for N and no treatment as well... So I sit on my fat lazy ass WITH her.... YAY

There's my week outline. Pretty epic huh?

Maybe that will give someone a little insight to why the fuck I'm so crabby. (**Don't mean this like a bitch I assure you =\ **) But I don't know what to do anymore.

B's mom didn't write me today. I hope his G'pa's okay.

I guess I just have to live until I get that letter in the mail, possibly assuring me for another day that I didn't dream him up and that he really does care. Well I know he cares but.... It's hard to see that right this minute...

Night y'all.